Me Lords, welcome to King’s Landing. I’m pleased that you’ve all arrived safely. By the looks of it, some of you might have gotten into mischief until the early morning hours at one of our many brothels so I appreciate your punctuality on the Crown summoning you.
It appears Westeros is as strong as it’s ever been after the potential catastrophe that came to our shores last year, just before the FFBMCO tournament began. I would like to personally thank all twenty of you for your valiant efforts rebounding from that adversity and in keeping FFBMCO the pinnacle fantasy football league in your Queens honor.
However I became aware of some silly vote you held in which one of you was elected by your peers into a position of power. How cute…meaningless titles for simple men. On top of that you think you have the authority to institute a tax without consulting the Crown? I could have arranged a sit down for you with my Master of Treasury and we could have worked on a proposal together.
And what is this drastic change of adding an IDP to your lineups? None of this was done with my knowledge let alone permission. Is this some sort of rebellion? I SQUASH REBELLIONS!
What the devil…? What is that strange music I hear? It sounds like some sort of song from … Oh no, it’s the self-proclaimed King of the North and his damned direwolves!
I pictured you as Billy Crystal from Princess Bride writing this mayhem. Good grief my brain hurts! Well Done.
Lol I was wasted and blaring music, it was a tight session.
PLAYOFFS?!?!?